Physical contact in a relationship is key to keeping your connection alive. But after you’ve been with the same person for an extended period of time, you might find that your sex life has become more routine than exciting.
If you’re stuck in a romantic rut with your significant other, there are a few things you can try to breathe some new life into your bedroom bonding.
Be honest
You and your significant other should be completely honest about what you like and don’t like about your sex life. Maybe you wish you spent more time on foreplay, and maybe your partner wishes you would talk more during sex. Whatever it is, giving each other open feedback (nicely, of course) will help you take things from average to amazing in no time.
Refrain from sex
Though it sounds counter-intuitive, swearing off sex for a certain amount of time (a week or two usually does the trick) can be just what the doctor ordered to spice up your sex life. As soon as you and your partner agree that you won’t have sex, you’ll probably start thinking about it a lot more. The first time you have sex again will be magical, and you’ll remember the feeling of restraint for many nights to come.
Explore new positions
Make a pact to try out a few positions that you’ve never done before. You may have to do some research, but it’s safe to say there’s a whole world out there that you’ve never experienced. Better yet, invent your own! As long as you and your partner are comfortable, there’s nothing off limits.
Film yourselves
Knowing that a camera is rolling intensifies the sex, and watching yourselves get down and dirty is sure to light a new fire. Word to the wise: keep the footage somewhere safe, and come to a mutual agreement about how it will be used long term.
Try a new location
Most couples stick to routine places for sex – usually in the bedroom, occasionally in the shower. Mix it up by having sex in a new room of your house – on the couch in the living room, on the table in the kitchen, etc. If you’re looking for a major change of scenery, drive to a secluded spot and hop in the back seat.
Take control
One night, tell your partner that you’ll be calling the shots in the bedroom. Promise that he or she can have his or her turn soon, as long as they play along tonight. Tell them what you want done to you and how you want the sex to be – they’ll pick up on what you like and what you’re craving. Just remember to return the favor!
Live out your fantasies
Have you and your partner ever discussed your sexual fantasies? Whether it’s role playing, a threesome or using a sex toy, it’s likely that both of you have some fantasies that you’ve yet to live out. Take a walk on the wild side, and enjoy the ride.
The most important part of improving your sex life is being open with your partner about what you need and how you’d like your sex to improve. Once you’re both on the same page, it should be easier to try out the tips above.
